I'm part of a lot of mums groups on Facebook; and I mean A LOT. Because I'm a mum and its kind of reassuring to have my Facebook filled with women who have as little daily adult conversation as I do, and truth be told motherhood can be a lonely place at times.
Generally the gist of these mothering groups tends to be "does this bodily fluid look normal? PICTURE IN COMMENTS"
I mean really? See a doctor, no you should not have that leaking out of you
"LOL just had sooooo much sex who wants to know the details *emoji emoji emoji*"
Oh shut up Sharon* your husband hasn't seen your vagina since you drank too much prosecco at Christmas let alone been able to poke it.
And last but not least "oh my Eugene* sat up at 5 minutes old, walked at 3 months and could recite Pythagoras Theorem by the time he was 2, is this normal? what are your babies doing?" That's funny I'm pretty sure I saw your kid eating his own shit in the park last week Katherine*, get back in your lane.
Then there's THAT POST. If you're in a mums group then you'll know what I mean. The age old cutthroat debate of breast v formula. I mean if I could roll my eyes any harder I'd feel them detach from the socket at the fact that in this day and age it requires a debate is beyond me.
Basically it's a massive my Dick is bigger than yours competition where the kids are the dicks (I mean usually there are anyway but y'know what I'm saying)
I'm gonna say it now:
I don't care how you feed your kid, as long as you actually fucking feed them!!
I needed it off my chest, and now I can go about my day judging everyone in silent.
*Names changed to protect me from these crazy ladies 🙊