No-ones been killed, but I do need to gloss the bathroom…Again!

It can only mean one thing…I’ve died my hair again. Knew there was a reason I only do this once every year or so. Because my hair is approximately 300 feet long I need multiple boxes of dye and some quick juggling practice beforehand making sure it’s all mixed at the same time so it develops evenly.

Gone and effing David Dickinsoned myself

I also quite clearly need Kim and Aggie on standby because it ended up everywhere. In my mothers house there’s multiple stains from over the years across that bathroom. HAIR DYE – not what you were thinking, minds out the gutter please.

One of many…

The thing is with my weird hair and hair dye is that it always ends up different to what the box predicts (yes even looking at the blonde, light and dark predictions on the side) so whenever I buy dye I’m sort of playing Russian roulette with the colour chart a bit. Usually it’s a nice surprise when I’ve dried it to what I end up with, but not this occasion. Not at all. See all that dye all over my bathroom and my landing carpet (comes out I’ve learned it’s cool), that belonged in my hair. And because it wasn’t there I had patches of my old colour left behind. I had completely missed spots all over my hair!

I had the colouring of a fucking Staffordshire Bull Terrier, the shower resembled the scene from Psycho and then the children required my attention. Fuckety fuck.



Okay, plan. No, panic! No. Plan. Definitely Plan… I can fix this. No I can’t. David can. Maybe? He’s my best shot on a Saturday evening. Good job I bought an extra box of dye. We’ll patch it up pretending its like going over roots… like the instructions say – 10 minutes roots (patches) then 20 rest of dye to blend. Great!

We get the Sophia to bed and wait for Teddy to fall asleep and get to work. David covers the patches and we wait the 10 mins and he chucks the rest of the dye over my hair. I glance at the instructions – shit. It was supposed to be 20 minutes THEN 10. How did I not read that right?! I mean I shouldn’t really be surprised, my track record isn’t exactly exemplary when it comes to dying my hair. As mentioned above I had a tendency to get dye everywhere. Well it’s not just the bathroom that gets it…my skin gets covered too; and once I even managed to dye a contact lens red.

In case its not apparent we do this practicaly naked...don't want dye on clothes after all

In case you haven’t noticed we do this nearly naked…wouldn’t want dye to get on our clothes right?

So 3 boxes of hair dye, 4 towels and some time later I have red hair. Kind of. I still have some uneven patches where some hasn’t taken much and others taken too well (thanks to my top notch instruction reading) and I’m not entirely sure I love it but it’s done. I figure once I require the roots doing I’ll go straight in with the 3 boxes of dye and do the root touch up properly next time and hope for the best. I say “I”…Davids doing it.

I can’t be trusted.

Hairdye end


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